Little Boxes

It seems that no matter how different we try to be, we always end up the same. We always end up fitting into some little sub-group or clique. That doesn't seem right to me. All these supposed role-models tell us to go out and be our own person and be unique and all that, but we all have to go up to the universities, then we come out all the same. So the Song of The Day is Little Boxes by this amazing band called Walk Off The Earth. Seriously, go to youtube right now and look up their cover of Somebody That I Used To Know (I have no clue who the original artist is, but the cover is better anyway.), it's awesome. I won't ruin it for you by telling you why it's awesome, but I think they could've used a couple more guitars. Y'know what guys, I'm just going through a whole mental deconstruction thing right now and I can't do this tonight. I'm just really messed up right now.

Music=Life

The Sound of Silence

Guess how much of today made sense! Nothing. I got lost in the dream world last night and I'm not sure if I'm even awake right now. It's a real inception moment, only instead of being Cobb, I'm more like Molley. Which is kind of sad. Don't worry, I'm not going to go off and kill myself because I'm confused, I'm just saying that I don't know what went on today. Literally, I know that I had toast for breakfast, pancakes for lunch, and spaghetti for dinner. Anything in between that really wasn't important I guess. So that's why the Song of The Day is The Sound of Silence by Simon & Garfunkel, because I don't understand what the song is about. Not much to report on today, I guess I'm a mean person. I never felt that I was excessively mean, but I can start paying more attention to what I say and do now.
Maybe the song of the day should've been Pain by Three Days Grace

Music=Life

Just Checking In

So, I was going through some old posts in the archives, and I'm astounded at how far I've come. I started this in 2010 with a small song library, now it's 2012 and I've learned of more music than I had thought there was back then. I mean, I knew of the bands and their music, but now I've got this entire computer filled with over a month of music, and that's not counting what's just on my Droid. This was one of those days that just didn't amount to anything. So fuck it.
Readers, do any of you have a song of the day?

Music=Life

Bleed It Out/Waiting For The End

There are those times when it seems like nobody around you knows what the fuck is really going on. This past month has been one of those times for me. The Songs of The Day are Bleed It Out and Waiting For The End, both by Linkin Park. Yes it's a song about suicide, but I'm far from that. Suicide is for the weak, and I'm not as weak as my other self seems to think. No, this is the song of the day because sometimes you have to do something drastic to make people realize what the real problem is. Now it seems like everybody in my family that is involved or has taken interest in this situation is just blaming my actions on my friends and Rocket, and that's not right. My father says that I was "just chasing some girl" (to put it nicely, I'd not repeat what he called her.), which sucks because she was looking forward to possibly meeting him this week, but after all that was said today I'm not sure that I want him here. He doesn't understand that all of this has nothing to do with the bitter feud that he and my mother have. He doesn't get that this isn't just because I live with somebody other than him. I don't live with him because I know that I'll never live up to his expectations, but it seems that even here I can't escape being a huge fucking disappointment to the bastard. So I don't know what to do to make him understand that I don't need somebody else flipping shit on me when I've pretty much kicked the crap out of myself every day since I failed my friends. He doesn't have that guilt, he's never let anybody down the way I have.
Then there's my Grandmother, one of the only 3 people that doesn't make me feel fucking useless because of this. No, she just makes me feel more guilty. There are only three things that really hurt me about all this. They are, in this order, letting down my grandparents, not being able to see Rocket as much, and knowing that my feeling of overall failure is justified. My Grandma and Grandpa (on my fathers side) are the people that are my inspiration to succeed. Even before I met Rocket, or my brothers in Florida, I knew I had to be famous to pay them back. They are first on my list of people to help when I make it. Of course my grandmother always wanted me to be a doctor, lawyer, or scientist, so a profession in the arts was out of the question to her, so I changed my plan a bit to where I could still be happy without being a disappointment. I know it sounds petty, but they are some of the most important people in my life, and I can't let them down. I'm seriously afraid that they might die if I go to juvie. I'm not fucking kidding.
In other news I "finished" my new mask. It's kind of a demonic skull looking face. It was originally orange, so I repainted it all white, and I wear it with a kind of ninja hood behind it so that the black and white contrast. I'm going to splatter it with red paint to look like blood splatter. It's gonna be sick.
Readers, what's your song of the day?


Music=Life

I'm Just A Kid

I'm done with hope, because hoping for things only leads to disappointment and the realization of how impossible your objective was in the first place, which then leads to sadness. So hope=sadness. In what could be my last Song of The Day for a while, I plan to say a lot. I won't, but I plan to.
The Song of The Day is I'm Just A Kid by Simple Plan, that's what I am, just a kid. In the eyes of my parents, in the eyes of the world, in the eyes of everyone I'm just a stupid kid. That's not going to be how they see me tomorrow though, tomorrow they'll just see a person who committed a crime or two. They won't see a kid, which isn't fair. A lot of it isn't fair or doesn't make sense though. You all tell us that as teenagers we need to start acting like adults, but refuse to stop treating us as children. Then when we start acting responsible and trying to be more adult you tell us that we have to appreciate the time we have because once we turn 18 nothing is fun anymore. Nothing is fun right now. I literally have one fun day a week if I'm lucky, and the only reason that it's fun is because I get to spend time with Rocket. Which doesn't happen very often anymore because I got expelled and my stepfather doesn't like her for absolutely no reason what-so-fucking-ever. He's trying to be nicer though, I know he is. He just really sucks at it, really. The point is that no matter what happens tomorrow, it won't feel right. Rocket, Dmitri, and I could get away with no punishment whatsoever, and I'd only feel more guilty. Or I get sent to juvie and lose my mind. Or get put on probation, which means that they'd try to stop Rocket and I from seeing eachother. I don't care though, even if they are reading this right now, I'd break whatever rules were put in front of me just to see her. I'd break out of wherever they throw me if it meant I could spend time with her more than just once a week. But it wouldn't be a discrete "dig under the ground with a spoon" breakout, I'd start a riot, then all of us would get out. Well, those of us that aren't getting the shit beat out of us or fighting with the officers.
Dmitri says that we probably won't get juvie though. How would he know? It's not like he's been picked up for shit like this before, plus they might be getting me with some federal charges or some bullshit like that, we don't know what they're charging me with because the genius in charge of serving me my summons LOST MY FUCKING PAPERS. Really? Your sole job is delivering some papers to a minor awaiting his court date, and you lose the papers? What kind of a dipshit do you have to be? And this isn't just a day before thing, they told us the papers were missing 3 days ago. So now I'm going in with no fucking clue as what to expect, or how to prepare myself. So I've got to wing it and do whatever the fuck I can to get the least possible punishment for myself, and if possible Rocket. Notice I'm not going to fight for Dmitri. Nope, not after finding out just why the cops stopped to talk to us in the first place. I told him we didn't need to steal anything, but nobody fucking listens to me. If people just listened to me, and had we stuck to my plan, this wouldn't be happening right now. So fuck him, because that's the mood I'm in right now.
Readers, what's your song of the day?

Music=Life

Take Over The World

"Gee Brain, what are we going to do tonight?"

Know the answer? If not, get out of my web address. The Song of The Day is Take Over The World by Your Favorite Martian. Y'know what, I don't have time for this. I'm about to watch Insidious. Hoping it's as scary as they all say it is. It's been a while since a movie has scared me.

Readers, what's your song of the day?

Music=Life

Let Go

I tried to narrow what happened yesterday down to one song, and I couldn't do it. Too many thoughts, too many feelings, not enough words. So I made a playlist today while I was lying in bed all day. It is as follows;

Sing For The Moment by Eminem
Somewhere I Belong by Linkin Park
I'm Just A Kid by Simple Plan
I Just Wanna Run by The Downtown Fiction
Lights Out by Mindless Self Indulgence

That's about it. I don't know what today's song of the day will be, but that covers yesterday.

Music=Life

Till I Collapse

A lot of you keep telling me to just give up. That I've got no reason to keep fighting. Hell, I was telling myself that for a couple weeks, but that's not who I am anymore. I'm a lyricist, a weaver of webs with words and music. If only I could put more out than just the words though. That doesn't matter, what matters is that this is what I do, I write, and I'm going to keep writing until my legs fall out from underneath me. Or the ground that I stand on, whichever comes first. Family was against my pursuit in the arts until recently, now that I may not have a lot of time left to pursue my dream of owning a guitar shop and writing for a famous band. Even if all of us know that this isn't the end of the world, we all know how I take things. I'll either leave the house every day for hours on end to gods-know-where, or I'll give up on everything and never leave my room and probably try to kill myself a couple times (third time's the charm right? not funny....).
The Song of The Day is Till I Collapse by Eminem, because I'm gonna keep at this songwriting thing until I die, not that I intend to die, I'm going to live forever as a god of music. Whether it's from my personal voice, or just the words from my pen, somebody that I don't know is going to remember me. You will remember me.
Readers, what's your song of the day?

Music=Life