When The Music Stops

I feel horrible. I feel bad because I'm afraid that I haven't learned anything from the past. It used to be that music always came first. Before family, before friends, before my health. I couldn't brush my teeth before I had a song going, let alone eat breakfast.

But what I'm really worried about is that I'll fail Rocket. I don't want to get to the point where one of us turns our back on the other because of my musical "addiction". When the music stops, I need to focus. She may distract me from everything else, but I won't let music distract me from her. The Song Of The Day is When The music Stops by Eminem, and it has almost nothing to do with what's going through my head right now.

I love Rocket, I do. And I love music just as much, which is a problem. I have this dream of being a famous rock star, but now there's the thought of a future with Rocket too, and I've seen the movies, read the interviews, heard the songs. You can't balance a relationship with your loved one, with a relationship with your lifestyle. Something has to change. So I don't know if the whole Rockstar lifestyle, always on the road and always busy with music or something, is the one for me. Sure Dave Grohl can make it work, and Gene Simmons did for nearly 30 years, but Gene Simmons is kinda a bad example. KISS is still around, but his relationship with Sharon, not so much. And that's what I'm talking about, I don't want to be like that. I don't want to get to the future where I have to choose between keeping a living and keeping a love. Because when it comes down to it, no matter how much you love your music, it's just another way to support yourself and your family and/or loved ones economically (again, not sure about the spelling of that word, but the Google spell check hasn't said anything about it yet so whatever.). Say I choose the music over her (I won't... Really, I won't... I hope I don't, I mean. fuck it.). What happens when the music stops for me and I've got nothing and nobody left but my words? I'm useless and going to die alone. And what happens to her if I choose The Music? I don't know, I'd like to think she'd move on and live an emotionally healthy lifestyle. But shit happens.

Only the Universe knows our fates Readers, and we are left to wonder what happens next, until it happens.

I know I'll choose Rocket, but the question is there, would she choose me if I left the rockstar life? I'd like to think that she would, I get that feeling from her. A real feeling, not just my brain convincing my heart. Readers, where will you be when the music stops?

Readers what's your song of the day?

Music=Life