If I Leave

I'm going to be completely honest, I don't know the lyrics to this song and I only chose it for the name. I know I like the song, and I've listened to it several times, I just don't have the lyrics memorized and don't feel like looking them up right now for fear that they might twist my message in this post into something that it's not meant to be. So for the integrity of this post, don't think of the lyrics. The Song of The Day is If I Leave by A Day To Remember.
They're sending me away. For whatever reason they have in their heads, because I know that the reason they told me isn't the real one. I also know that Mother knows me. She knows that anytime I get on a plane alone, it's a one way ticket, and I'm not ready to leave like that. I'm not ready to go home. I've got promises to keep, I've got a real love that I want to keep with me. I also know that if I leave, Rocket will think that I've abandoned her, because I won't be able to come back. That's part of their plan though, because my grandmother told me she'd pay for a one way ticket for me and to ship my stuff up there, so it won't just be for the summer. Not that I can talk to anybody in my family about this, none of them would listen. None of them care what I want or what's really best for me. On top of that I'd be returning home as a failure. I can't do that, I won't survive it. Old friends will ask what happened to me, wondering why I've changed from the innocent dreamer that I once was, into some delusional delinquent. Then there's my other self, the bastard doubts everything everyone says. Distorting words and phrases to sinister meanings and contexts, reminding me just how weak I am. If I can't control my own mind how can I control the situation? How can I fix a problem on the outside if I'm fighting a war with myself on the inside? Everything is just fucked right now, and things are only going to get worse from here. I know it, I can feel the energies shifting around me and in this house. Something is about to break, and it's not just my mind. I can't leave yet, I'm not ready to go home, I've still got things to take care of here, I've still got Rocket and I'm not about to leave her just to escape some legal issues. We were together when all of this started, and the only way we're going to get through this is together.
I can't go home yet..

Music=Life