Duality

I'm constantly being told how good of a person I am. How smart I am. How respectful I am. But it's all a lie. I'm not meant to be a perfect kid, or some genius that cures cancer (which in theory is uncurable. Seeing as how cancer is basically just a faulty cell or some failing part of the persons cellular structure, the only actual cure is death.), hell I may not even end up being the Rockstar I want to be, but none of that matters to these people. They only see the good, because that's all that I let them see. They don't see the sides of me that show how messed up in the head I really am. The fact that there's more than one should give a hint! I'm constantly combating these other sides just to make sure I don't say or do something that I'll regret for the rest of my life. Maybe in retrospect I should have tried a little harder to keep all these bad ideas locked away, so uh... My bad. The point is, that no matter how much these people tell me how bright, nice, and good I am it just makes this worse. That I can get away with such a con, deceiving even myself at times, only encourages this. Sure I can be polite to the point where it's like I'm from a different time, but I'm not a good person because of that. I've fucked up a LOT. Getting arrested and expelled are some of the worst things to ever happen to me, but I caused it by being a bad person. My grandmother says that "The path to hell is paved with good intentions", I believe it. My intentions have always damned me. Even if I was just trying to help, or to protect somebody, or even if I was doing what should be considered the right thing, I've always been punished for trying to be a good guy, so in their eyes aren't I the bad guy? I don't know where else I'd go with this, but I think I'm done. The Song of The Day is Duality by Slipknot.
Readers, what's your song of the day?

Music=Life